I have just discovered that “pollywog” or “polliwog” is another name for a tadpole but I have also heard it described as that stage where you are halfway through the transformation from being one thing to another, from being a tadpole to a frog. Remember, the tadpole starts off its life as an aquatic creature with a long tail and gills but gradually starts to grow legs, loses the tail and develops lungs so that it goes from living above the waterline to below it. Quite a metamorphosis. But when it is in mid transition it must be one hell of a tough place to be. It is neither tadpole nor frog. It must feel awkward, unfamiliar, clumsy. I wonder if it knows that it will come to an end and that one day it will finally grow into a frog!

Life feels a little like that for me at the moment. I have left a full-time job and set up my own business. I feel like I have left the safe pond of the organisation that I worked for and have hopped out onto the bank of the world of the entrepreneurs and the self-employed. The only problem is I am not yet a fully formed frog. I am still in the process of developing the legs and lungs that I need to survive in this world. I feel awkward and ill-equipped to deal with all the complexities of owning your own business. Sometimes I feel I just want to turn the clock back and jump right back into the pond that I came from but I know that is not possible.

It is scary and it is exciting at the same time. I have moments of blind panic interspersed with little moments of achievement such as writing my first blog, publishing my website, opening my business bank account, getting my first client ….. all little milestones in the life of the 21st century entrepreneur. I know I can never turn back and I know it may not work out as I hope it will. But there is one thing I know for sure….. every time I get that knot in my stomach or hit another milestone, I know I am really alive, really living and I would not have it any other way!

Rebbit!!

I know, I know, loving change ain’t all that easy. Change can be painful, hard work, uncertain and to say the least, uncomfortable. Unless we are in a really bad place (and sometimes not even then) most of us wish that we would never have to change.
But, to quote a Mr. Robert C. Gallagher, ‘Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine”. We are always, and have always been, in the middle of some change process or another, even if it is just the process of aging. And nowadays, change seems not only to be found everywhere, but seems to have developed a speed that leaves the mind boggling. There is no escaping it!
And since there is no escaping it, we may as well learn to appreciate it and embrace it. Imagine what the world would be like if we had no change – we would still be living in caves!! Imagine what we would be like as individuals if we never developed and grew! I shudder to think what I would be like if I never changed from my first job all those years ago. What if the seasons never changed? What if we never grew old and died? We would have to stop having children. We would never bother challenging ourselves or doing new things because we had eternity to do it. We would never appreciate the smell of fresh flowers or the sight of a beautiful sunset because the fact that we had eternity to experience them would make them seem commonplace. Imagine all the joy and experiences we would be missing out on if we did not have change!
Even when change is painful, it is usually necessary for the cycle of life to continue.
So, while we may curse and resist change, we should learn to love it too as it is what makes life interesting and worth living. And maybe the next time we will move to meet it half way and welcome it as an old friend; a friend who may well challenge and frustrate us, but who always leaves us wiser and better off for having known them.


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